Your work matters. So do you.

His face was bright red.

He looked down at me, practically spitting his anger. Next to him stood the organization’s development director, silent but glowering.

My sin? I ran the box office of a large regional theater, and it was opening night. My (somewhat impossible) task was to both ensure every seat in the house was full and make sure every bigwig got the best seats.

One board member decided not to show up until intermission. By then, the volunteer ushers had filled his seats. But he was still pissed.

And rather than talking to him about outsized expectations and the good of the theater, the managing director decided to scream at me. In front of my staff.

(Surprisingly, that wasn’t the job I was most eager to leave. Nor was the one where the boss regularly asked people “what have you done to justify your existence today?” I’ll tell you about the one that really did me in someday.)

I’m a long-termer

In my 30+ years of fundraising, I’ve bucked the trend toward short stays. I didn’t usually stay 18 months. More like 7 or 12 years.

Could be stubbornness. Could be loyalty. Could be fear of change.

I’ll plead guilty to all of the above.

I only left the first job when I moved. And the second when a new boss made the old one look like Santa Claus. (I had just had a baby. And she absolutely hated the idea of someone with kids.)

It hurt to go. So much of my identity was tied up in my work for that organization!

I’m also not alone

There’s a reason for the high rate of staff turnover in our sector. Our jobs aren’t easy. They demand a lot from us – not just time, but commitment and emotional involvement. And most of the time, they’re not well-paid.

Also, as it was in the box office, sometimes expectations are just…  ridiculous.

I’m no longer a staffer at a nonprofit. Instead, I work with nonprofit clients. And that’s wonderful for me. It’s a relationship that goes both ways. There are expectations of me, of course. And deadlines can be tough.

But if a client treated me like the managing director above did, I could end the relationship right away.

Though I understand that if you’re working for an organization – even one you love – you may be facing difficult personalities or impossible expectations.

What can you do?

Know your worth and believe in it

If you do your best work, you focus on your mission as well as others’ expectations. You need to get tasks done, but you also need to make learning part of your daily practice.

Make sure your supervisors understand that.

You also have a life outside the office. And you’re not cheating if you go home to a spouse, a child, or a pet. Smart bosses get this. They understand that the quality of work matters much more than the quantity of hours. And they give good employees flexibility. We all learned a lot about doing good work remotely. Even if it’s sometimes done late at night or early in the morning.

But often, you’re not offered this understanding and flexibility. You need to claim it.

Build your own case

A case for support is an important fundraising tool. It moves donors to give. It also informs them.

Make and update a case of your own. If you’re a fundraiser, do good work and show it. Keep records. Know your results. Build relationships. They’ll make you more and more valuable to the organization.

I’m not suggesting you walk around patting yourself on the back. But when you’re challenged, there’s nothing better than plain old facts. Personalities differ. But facts are facts. If your fundraising program is growing because of you, it’s important to show it.

Support your colleagues

If you see someone else being mistreated, speak up. Because it’s the right thing to do. But also because a toxic leader infects everyone. And sooner or later, it will hurt you, too.

Most bullies don’t expect to be challenged. Often, they back down quickly when it happens.

And while you’re building donor relationships, use those skills to build relationships in-house as well. Little things, like taking a few minutes to catch up with a colleague or asking about their kids, can make the whole team work better.

What you do matters

Your work means something. You mean something. It’s a privilege to spend your time working toward something you believe in. But believe in you, too.

You’ll last longer, you’ll do better work, and you’ll help more people if you do.

Photo by Andre Hunter on Unsplash